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August 16, 2006
Grandpa Bob
My posts lately have been few and far between and probably not that interesting. Hopefully we're getting back into the swing of things.
My step grandfather passed away last week and we were at the service on Monday night in Maryville and it was a very sweet time with family. My uncle Tommy gave a great message and my cousins Christy and Lee led the worship. Christy sang Come to Jesus at the end and it was amazing. I really want that song at my funeral (for those of you who are still around). On the day that Bob passed away, we were supposed to go and visit and my mom called and told us not to come because he was having a hard time. I told Lizzie that we couldn't go visit because grandpa Bob was sick, so she talked about that the next few days and even suggested that maybe they should give him some medicine. On Saturday she was still talking about him being sick so I took the opportunity to tell her that grandpa Bob had died and gone to heaven. I had asked my sisters advice before talking to her to kind of prepare myself for her responses and she said just to be honest and if I didn't know an answer to say I don't know and then if it got really complicated to say, "hey look Lizzie, a butterfly." (that's a joke of course)
"I just wanted to tell you that yesterday Grandpa Bob died and is in Heaven."
Lizzie- "Oh, (thinking) did he see God and Jesus?"
"Yes, he did."
"Did he say hi to them?"
"Yes."
"Is he wearing his shoes?"
"I don't know, that's a really good question. Do you have any other good questions?"
"Yes, I have a question mommy. If when you are swimming in a pool and you open your eyes in the water then it will hurt your eyes, right?"
"Umm, yes sometimes. Do you have any other questions?" (related to the topic)
"Yes, if daddy dies with grandpa Bob then it will just be us girls, me, you and Julia?"
(uh, can we go back to the pool questions)
"Yes, daddy will go to heaven when he dies, but he is not dying right now and will be here with us for a while."
(now I can tell she's processing all the information and I'm about to pull out my distracting butterfly comment)
"So, grandpa Bob dies and um (she gets excited right here and jumps off her chair) its going to be for 3 days like in this book . . . (runs to get Easter book) this is the heaven book mommy, if you die you should read this book."
(oh man)
Then she starts to tell a story showing the front of the book,
"This is Jesus and he's a doctor."
"Why do you say that Lizzie?" (I'm hoping here that she's made some connection with the stories she knows about his miracles and acts of healing)
"Well, he has a white robe on."
Ok, so no such luck. That was pretty much the extent of our conversation. She talked about it the rest of the night and then pretty much dropped the topic. I do know that kids can grasp so much more then we give them credit for and their thinking is so simple. Each question she had was the same intensity, from the shoes, to the pool, to her dad dying.
I am thankful that in this instance I didn't have to explain that grandpa Bob would not be raised from the dead in 3 days, but I wouldn't be surprised if it came up again. . .
"Hey look Lizzie, a butterfly!"
| By JennR | 1:10 PM
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Comments
At least we're all being entertained by your complicated parenting issues - that's the important part.
Posted by: Lisa at August 17, 2006 8:39 AM